A Whirlwind of Emotions – Shweta Bahal

Content Warning:
Please proceed with due discretion if you are sensitive to content that entails the current pandemic and/or general despair.

Deeper

Deeper

Deeper I drown, in the pool of my own darkness, of my own creation

The abyss beneath it,

threatening to overwhelm me

 

As I desperately try to grasp on to something,

Anything, to anchor me to the world

To help me feel again

To help ignite a fire to drive away the clouds of grief that engulf me,

 

But how?

Reality seems an illusion,

The noises, now only a dull thudding in my ears

The uneasy quiet that surrounds me

The heart? Hollow, the mind? Chaos.

 

Hope? The word holds no meaning to me now

Only coldness everywhere,

I feel lost, detached.

It all started with a dull thudding in my heart

Tears streaming down my eyes,

Gradually turning into numbness.

 

Now, there seems no way out

Of this chasm of never-ending misery

As everything slowly faded away, and somewhere in between

I did too.

– Shweta Bahal, The Somaiya School, Mumbai

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