I was 11-12 when I first thought about girls.
I was young and had no idea about homosexuality. I thought it was just a funny trick my hormones were playing on me.
Two years later, I had forgotten all about my homosexual thoughts and dreams. I deemed my earlier experiences as childish and immature, blaming them squarely on my hormones. I convinced myself I was straight, can you believe that?
A year later, I gradually grew more comfortable with the idea of homosexuality and what it stands for, so I explored it more in a safe environment. For me, this environment was Twitter, where I was able to express my thoughts and complex emotions freely. I labelled myself as pansexual leaning towards girls. Pansexual, according to various organizations, is the sexual, romantic or emotional attraction towards people regardless of their sex or gender identity.
While this is simply a small glimpse into the very long and complicated journey I’ve had so far, what I can conclude from my experience is that we’re living in a heteronormative society. I would have realized by sexuality sooner and would be less scared to explore it if I was free to do so. Seeing straight people on televisions, magazines, posters etc. with no homosexual representation made me feel isolated and abnormal. We have to work towards a more accepting society for us, our friends, children, and strangers, and make sure that no one ever feels alone or isolated merely because of who they love.
~Jahnavi, online schooling, Janakpuri
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