21st March, 2018
A new day sparks up new hopes in every heart that beats. Some souls smiled as today’s morning set in, while some other ones dreaded its arrival. Unfortunately, I am one of those who can do nothing but regret having lived this day.
Mankind can’t be worse to me than it is. Having lived thirteen years of my life, I’d always believed in its kindness but it showed me harshness. Being brutally harassed by the one I was told to respect ever since I was three, seems like a nightmare. Today, I sit and wonder whether all that I’ve faced in the past one year is reality or just some sort of a horrific imagination. Pinching myself many times, and getting hurt each time, forced me to accept the truth. They were to be my mentors but turned out to be torturers. When I first met them, I expected love. But, they succeeded in proving their hatred. I have finally realised that there are greater fears than fearing a little bug. People say writing a diary helps balance excitement. Thus, I write my first and last diary today, to judge if they’re right.
I have a small and loving family, and a caring group of friends. It’s all because of their presence that I could strongly make it until today.
Injustice knocked on my door the day my faith in justice grew. My optimism had to leave when my life took an unexpected turn towards the dark alleys of fate.
Today is the first time I’ve opened up. I’ve gone through a lot that I’d never even dreamt of. All this while, I’d falsely ensured myself that I’m a strong soul and that I can face it all. I tried my best to hold onto my belief that these wintry nights will pass and will take the storm along with it, but I failed. I feel sorry for myself that I can’t fight till the end anymore, so I’ve decided to stop fighting and meet my end.
I was blessed to be constantly surrounded by love but alas, that hatred in their eyes outshone it all. Bidding farewell is hard but I leave behind my goodwill to the ones who stood by me. After this, I’ll smile every day and shine like that one star that I’ve been fascinated with since childhood. I hope memories are strong enough to keep me alive in them. Lastly, if there’s another life, I wish to be with Ma, Papa, and Bhaiya again.
Ekisha, with her eyes soaked in tears, called up her father just to plead with him to come as soon as they could. Death was her decision, but she still longed to live. While tying the rope and climbing upon the chair, she constantly hoped that her family will show up right in time to save her. Recounting the good times and fighting her last battle with herself, she pushed the chair down.
[A work dedicated to Ekisha Sah to let a wider audience feel just a very little bit of what she went through, hoping she gets justice.]
~Tanisha Karmakar, AIS Noida
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